


Coffee and Cigarettes

by crowreys_angel_blade



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Scars, Stanford Era, hurt!Dean, stanford!sam
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-19
Updated: 2014-12-22
Packaged: 2018-02-21 18:08:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2477582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crowreys_angel_blade/pseuds/crowreys_angel_blade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(I suck at summaries but here goes...)<br/>Dean is a barista working at a 24hr coffee shop just around the corner from Stanford University's main campus. He's pretty-much perfect; he sings, he dances, he plays guitar... But, there's a catch. You see, Dean has this... problem. Well, one among the many is that Dean can't be touched. On touch from another person sends him reeling into a PTSD panic attack. He sees himself as a freak, as does most of the world because of the scars on his face; but, there's one person who doesn't. Sam Campbell. The hazel-eyed boy that comes in every night. Alone. Sits at the same table and orders the same drink: Triple Red Eye; no cream, no sugar. The strongest drink the little shop's got. Dean finds himself falling for the mystery man with the bright smile and the hearty laugh. Soon, Hazel Eyes finds himself falling for the scarred, green-eyed man who makes his drink, just, right. Will they be able to overcome their troubled pasts and fall in love? Read to find out!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I'm late!

_You’re nothing but a spoiled little brat! You’re the reason she’s dead! If you would have kept your fucking mouth shut she would have never hit that other car! You, crying like a little baby, was the distraction that killed your mother! She’s gone. For that, you’re gonna be punished! Come here you ungrateful little sh-_

Dean awoke with a start to the screeching of his damn alarm clock. **6:00 pm.** In a way, he was glad. If his alarm hadn’t gone off, this ~~day~~ evening could have started off much worse. Dean sighed, running a calloused hand over his rough face, feeling the stubble on his chin and something…wet, under his eyes. Dean realized he was crying in his sleep. This wasn't the first time he’d woken up like this, and it most certainly won’t be the last.

  
Dean sighed, throwing the covers off and walking to the bathroom. He leaned over the rusted sink and turned it on; the pipes shook before spurting out a small stream of cool water. He ran a dripping hand over his face. He looked up when he reached for an old, ratty towel. His green eyes were met with a plain grey wall. No mirror. There were none in the entire apartment.

  
Cas has been telling him to get one. He says it’s not healthy never looking at yourself. Of course, Dean had to defend himself.

************  
He made his case saying, “Why would I need to look at myself when there are so many better things to look at?” Figures that Cas would be offended by that.  
“Dean, you are an extremely handsome man, scars and all. They give you a rugged look. But, sadly, you’re not my type. You would be if—“  
“If what? If I didn’t have scars all over my damn face.” It was a statement. Dean knew the truth.

Cas gasped. A little overdramatically, Dean might add.

“No, you dumbass! Never! I happen to love your scars, okay? They make you, well, you. It’s because you’re so fucking submissive! A sub and a sub don’t really go together!” Dean flat out laughed. Sure, it was sarcastic, but a laugh from Dean is a rare occurrence.

“Cas, I am NOT submissive.”

Now it was Cas’ turn to laugh. “Oh that’s bullshit Dean and you know it.”

Dean sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I am so not talking to you about this right now.”

That was that.

************

The young man smiled at the memory. Damn Cas. Everyone needs a best friend, right? Well his best friend just so happened to be his boss too.

  
_**“It was the heeeeeat of the moment! Telling me what your heart meant. The heeeeeat of the moment! Shone in your eeeyyyyeeeesssss”** _

Dean picked up his phone from the bedside table, glancing at the caller i.d.

_Speak of the devil._ Dean thought. He flipped open the phone and held it up to his ear, silencing Asia.  
  


"Dean! Babe! Where are you? You’re late!”  
He looked at the clock. **7:23 pm.**

  
_Did I really stare at a gray wall for an hour and a half?_  
“Shit, Cas. I’m sorry. I’m leaving my apartment now.”  
“Hurry up, man. I’m pretty backed up here!”

Dean tuned in to the background noise. He could hear the whir of the espresso machines and the chatter of customers. Cas sure did sound busy.

“Be there in 10.” He hung up, bolted to his closet and pulled out his work standard: grey t-shirt, jeans, and a black apron. He threw everything on but the apron and ran outside, apron in hand.

Luckily, the shop wasn’t far from his shitty apartment. At a slow jog, he got there in about 5 minutes. He burst through the door in a not-so-subtle way causing everyone in the shop to turn and look at him. All in all, it was about 3 people.

“What the fuck man?! You said you were busy!”  
“Good to see you too Dean-o! Besides, you know I can only take two at a time!” Cas winked at the elderly gentleman in the front of the line.

Dean heard a snort behind him, followed by a somewhat familiar laugh. He turned around to find himself face to chest with Hazel Eyes.  
“S-sorry..” Dean stuttered sidestepping him and turning to walk behind the counter.

“Haha don’t worry about it!” Hazel Eyes smiled warmly at the shorter man.  
Dean responded the way anyone would if an extremely attractive, greek-god-looking looking man smiled at him. He grabbed the nearest rag and took particular interest in scrubbing a stubborn spot on the counter. Smooth.

Now, Hazel Eyes was a regular. He came in every night and ordered the same thing: a Triple Red Eye; no cream, no sugar, which is the strongest thing this little shop carries. Black coffee topped off with three shots of espresso, served hot or cold.  
Cas gave Dean a look from the corner of his eye before rolling both of them. He turned back to the machine and finished making the gentleman his macchiato. “You come and see me again now sweetheart.” He winked as he gave the man his coffee. The man just smirked and sipped his coffee before walking out.

“What can I do ya for?” Cas smiled up at Hazel Eyes. Dean interrupted the man before he could even speak.  
“Triple Red Eye; no cream, no sugar.”

Both men turned to stare at him.  
“Wait, what?” Cas looked genuinely confused. “Yeah, how’d you know what I was gonna order?” Hazel Eyes asked, an amused smirk on his face.

“W-well, I uh.. I mean.. you come here, like, every night. You get the same- the same drink every night. You, uh, sit at the same table, too, and I have a um a pretty good memory. And, uh, yeah.”

Dean was twisting and turning the rag in his hands, wringing and unwringing it over and over again. He could feel that his face was a hot, fiery red. Hazel Eyes was smiling at him.

 

Smooth motherfucker that Dean was, he ran.

Dean raced to the back room as fast as he could, shutting the door behind him. He ran his hands through his hair.  
From behind the door he could hear Hazel Eyes’ pleasant voice. “Yeah, what he said.”  
That man’s voice could stop wars, I tell you.

Cas rang him up and Dean heard them laughing. They were laughing at him. Laughing. At. Him. Or, at least Dean thought that they were laughing at him getting embarrassed, but in reality, they were laughing at how adorable he was.

From that day on, seeing the way they looked at each other, Cas made it his personal mission to break Dean out of his shell and get them together.

But you see, Sam and Dean had their own missions.

Sam’s was to get Green Eyes to fall in love with him.

Dean’s was to avoid Hazel Eyes at all costs.


	2. You can come out now...... or not!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean tries to avoid Sam at all costs! Gabriel is introduced.. and something super exciting happened!

"Dean? Darling? You can come out now... He's gone."

Cas' soothing voice rang through the back room. He found Dean curled in on himself behind a stack of boxes. He was obviously terrified. Flashbacks. They happen when Dean over-thinks. 

Dean whimpered.

Cas knelt before the younger man, sighing.

"Hey. Hey Baby.. shhh.. it's okay.. I'm here." Cas lightly brushed his fingertips over Dean's knuckles.

The younger man jerked his hand away as if he'd been burned, letting out a long wail.

"Dean. Dean. Open your eyes. Open your eyes, Doll. Lemme see those forest-green eyes that I love so much."

Dean tentatively raised his head from where it was buried into his forearms. He blinked his bloodshot eyes open slowly, as if he were just waking up. His pupils were dilated and his eyes were unfocused; quickly darted to all corners of the room before settling on the man in front of him.

"That's it. That's it baby boy, focus on me. Right here. I'm right here." Cas smiled, he gently cupped Dean's face and ran a thumb over his cheekbone in soothing motions. Dean squeezed his eyes shut tightly jerking away from the older man's touch once again.

"No. No babe. Don't look away. Look at my eyes. They're blue not brown. Think of how far we've come. Hold my hand."

Cas smiled as Dean gently grasped his hand with cold, shaky fingers.

"Look at our hands. I'm touching you, and you're okay. You're fine. Remember when I couldn't do this:" Cas gently squeezed Dean's calloused hand.

"We've come so far.. And i'm not hurting you. Am I hurting you, Dean?"

Dean looked at their hands in an almost dream-like state. "N-no. You're n-not h-h-hurting me." Dean managed to stutter. 

"Hey, Hun. Look at me. Look at my face. What is my name?"

Dean looked up with pleading eyes, studying Cas' face for a moment. 

"I-I don't know."

"You do know, Dean. Think. Who am I?" Cas begged Dean with his eyes; furrowing his brow and searching Dean's eyes with his own baby blues.

Dean had a moment of revelation. His eyes focused and his breathing became more even. 

"Cas. You're Cas."

Cas let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. 

"Oh thank God. Good. Really good. Okay who are you?"

"Dean. I'm Dean."

"What day is it?"

"September 22, 2003."

"Good. Good, Dean. Are you with me?"

"Yeah. Yeah, Cas. I'm with you."

Dean smiled, squeezed Cas' hand, and stood up slowly; knees cracking with the effort.

"Thanks."

"No problem, Doll."

Dean sat down with a huff at the break table, pulling out his phone to check the time. **11:23 pm.**

_Damn. How long have I been sitting there?_

_"_ Hey, Hun. You ready to come back out here?" Cas called from out front. 

"Yeah. Yeah, be out in a sec."

Dean sighed, threw on his apron, and walked out front to where Cas was. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hazel Eyes sitting at his usually spot, a small little booth in the back, typing away at his computer. 

"Cas.. I thought you said he was gone?!" Dean whisper-yelled.

"He was! I guess he just stepped outside to smoke."

Dean sighed. Figures. 

He busied himself by cleaning the espresso machines. And wiping down the counter. And cleaning the espresso machines again. 

He didn't happen to glance over at Hazel Eyes' table every other minute. Not at all. And his heart doesn't break a little bit when an attractive honey-eyed boy joins Hazel Eyes and grabs his hand like it belongs in his. Not. At. All. 

"Cas?"

"Hmm?"

"Who is that guy?" Dean flicked his head towards the man with Hazel Eyes. 

Cas spared a quick glance at the honey-eyed man. "I don't know."

 Dean looked down shyly, ducking his head and staring at his feet.

"Oh. My. God. Dean! You're jealous!" Cas had this giant smirk that Dean wanted to just smack off of his damn face.

"I'm soo not jealous! Like, not at all. Nope." 

"Oh you so are Dean." 

Dean glanced at Hazel Eyes. That guy with honey-eyes was looking at him. More like glaring, actually. 

His reaction: scrub a "spot" on the counter. Harshly. 

 

 

****Meanwhile at Sam's table..****

 

"So that's the guy you've been talking about, Sam?" 

Gabriel gave Sam a "wtf" look. "Seriously?"

"Yeah! Isn't he gorgeous?" Sam gazed at him wistfully. 

"Umm... But, his face is....." 

"His face is what? Scarred? Yeah, I know. I still think he's beautiful."

Sam smiled glancing at Green Eyes (who has the most beautiful green eyes that Sam has ever seen).

Dean had his back to Sam, the muscles stretching the shirt tight around his wide shoulders. Sam follows the curve of his back down to his firm, enticing--

"Sam!" 

Sam looks at his friend as if he's been slapped. "What?!" 

"Dude, you were staring. Again." Gabe said in a huff. He was getting increasingly more annoyed. 

"I cant help it he's just so-" 

"Whatever, man. I'm gonna head out of here. See you later." Gabriel practically stormed out the door leaving Sam dumbfounded. 

"U-um did you want another, uh, Triple Red Eye?"

Sam looked up to find Green Eyes looking down at him. 

 _He's even more beautiful up close._ Sam thought. 

"Yeah, uh, sure. Thanks." 

"You're welcome." Dean carefully set the steaming mug on the table near Sam's computer and began to walk away. 

"Hey!" Dean spun on his heel to look at the younger man. 

"Something else you need, Sir?" Dean asked. 

"Yeah, your name. I come here every night and I've never asked your name."

"Uh, I'm Dean."

"Nice to meet you, Dean. I'm Sam."

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *GASP* They finally know each other's names!  
> Chapter 2! Yay!  
> Thanks so much everyone for reading and commenting!  
> This story is receiving so much more feedback than I expected!  
> Once again, constructive criticism is appreciated, but haters will be blocked!


	3. Interesting Introductions

_Sam. Sam. Sam. Sam._

A mantra was repeating itself in Dean’s head over and over again, consisting of only one word: _Sam._

It was a nice name. Simple. A perfect match to Sam’s nice face and nice body, Dean concluded. He wondered it was short for Samuel, or if it was his great, great, grandpappy’s name from the Civil War and he had inherited the name.

He wondered if that’s what their children would be named.

 _Wait, what?!_ Dean pulled himself out of his thoughts.

“Kids? Where the hell did that come from?” Dean sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair, and over his face.

 _He probably doesn’t even like kids, let alone want any_.

Dean collected his things and walked out of the back room, heading to the front of the shop. He greeted Cas at the door who was coming from the apartment they shared; where Dean was heading. Cas busied himself immediately, wiping the counters and preparing for the morning rush. Dean spared him a short glance and a curt wave before pulling the hood of his jacket up, ducking his head, and walking out the door.

Dean walked fast with his head down; not wanting to draw any attention to himself in the rising light. As the sun rose, he saw a few people on the sidewalk. He glanced at a couple walk-of-shamers who had their shoes in their hands, and ducked his head when a 6am-health-nut jogger ran past him with a short shout of “On your left!”

Dean heard a few snickers and a couple gasps as he walked past a small group of college students. This seemed to be a standard occurrence whenever Dean left the house. He just ducked his head lower, hunched his shoulders, and kept walking. A couple minutes later, he was home. _Finally._

He shoved the key into the lock and all but threw the door open. He shrug out of his jacket and hung it on the hook before walking to the couch and plopping down on it. He flicked on the t.v. and let the enthusiastic voice of Bob Barker lull him to sleep.

**************

_**Meanwhile at the Café…** _

To say Cas was busy, was the understatement of the century. Cas was slammed. The café was packed; crowded by early morning college students and businessmen from the business center a few blocks down. Macchiatos, cappuccinos, and lattes where flying the machines and Cas’ hands as quickly as possible, it was impressive.

“Hey man, do you need any help?” An unfamiliar voice said from the crowd.

“No no no. I’m okay. Thanks, though.” Just as Cas finished that statement a tray of scones dropped from his hands and onto the floor.The orders didn’t cease and he didn’t have time to clean them up.

“Here; let me help with that.” The voice said.

As Cas looked up, he put a face to that sweet voice. His own blue eyes were met with eyes he couldn’t described as anything less than ‘sunshine shining through a glass of whiskey’. The man was gorgeous. And vaguely…. familiar.

The man grabbed the scones and threw them away before grabbing an apron and washing his hands. He set to work taking orders and making drinks, way quicker than Cas expected of a newbie. Cas was shocked. “One caramel macchiato, extra caramel! One iced vanilla latte, hold the whip! One small cappuccino with an extra shot! Order up!”Honey eyes cried out, sliding each drink across the counter to the appropriate customer.

Within twenty minutes, the rush was over and the shop was empty save for a few people scattered throughout the booths.

“So, I never caught your name.” Cas stated, looking at the gorgeous young man who was drying a mug.

“My name is Gabriel. But you can call me Gabe; everyone does.” He smiled at Cas.

“Yeah you came in with Sam once, right?”

“Yeah! How do you know Sam?”

“Oh. Sam is just a regular customer. Comes in every night.” Cas smiled wistfully.

“Oh yeah. He was telling me about some guy that works here. He’s crushing on him.”

“Ha ha! I knew it!” Cas exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. While Cas was having his episode Gabe scoffed and rolled his eyes without notice.

“So how do you know Sam, Gabe?” Cas asked with interest.

“Oh well we go way back! We grew up together so he’s my best friend.” Gabriel said before pausing, “And… ex-boyfriend.” He mumbled that part, looking down at his feet. Cas put a consoling hand on Gabe’s shoulder.

“How’d you learn about, you know, all of this stuff?” Cas said gesturing to the cappuccino machines and blenders all around them. “What you did today was amazing, you had to have had some training of some sort.”

“I worked at Starbucks for a few years when I was in high school. Its how I paid my way through college.”

“That’s awesome!” Cas beamed at him.

“Soo…. How would you like to work here?”

Gabe raised an eyebrow at the manager. “Really?”

“Yeah! Of course! I mean, we’d have to schedule a formal interview and I’m gonna need to ask the boss, but considering you have previous experience and you handled the morning rush like a pro, so if everything goes smoothly; you’ve got a job!”

Gabe smiled warmly and, without warning, pulled Cas into a tender hug.

“What we’ll do, is consider today a trial day and we’ll set up your interview for tomorrow at noon. Does that work for you, Gabe?”

“Sounds perfect.”

*******

_“Please. Please Sam. Please kiss me.” Sam stared into those beautiful green eyes and was powerless. Dean was staring up at him with pleading eyes, worrying his plump lower lip between his teeth. Up close, Sam could see the dusting of freckles between his scars. Those galaxies danced along the bridge of his nose and across his cheekbones. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Dean’s perfect ones. Dean was moaning into his mouth. “Mmm Mr. Campbell.” Sam groaned. “Mr. Cambell…”_

“Mr. Cambell!” Sam jolted in his seat. He looked up find an unenthused Professor Roché looking down at him.

“Mr. Campbell, did you enjoy your nap?” Professor Roché rolled his eyes when Sam chose not to repond. “Very well then, copy your notes from someone else. Class dismissed.” He dismissed the class with a wave of his hand.

Everyone scurried to collect their things and shuffle out the door. Sam groggily followed, his mind still cloudy from sleep. Sam shuffled through the halls, trying not to bump anyone in his clumsy state. He finally made it back to his dorm, threw his backpack on the floor, and collapsed in the bed.

********

Dean groaned as he awoke. He arched his back and stretched as he arose from the couch; twisting his back until he heard a satisfying pop and left out a sigh of relief. He rubbed a hand over his rough face, feeling the scars and some stubble.

 _Time for a shave._ He thought to himself as he slowly made his way to the bathroom, glancing at the clock as he went.

**2:03pm.**

He went to the bathroom and began to shave, running his hand behind every stroke of the razor to be sure he got all the hair there. That was the only downside of not having a mirror.

His stomach let out a frustrated growl as he was wiping the water off of his face. He walked into the small kitchen that had barely enough room for one person let alone two, so Cas does most of the cooking while Dean cleans. It works.

He grabbed ham, cheese, bread, and mayo and fixed himself a sandwich. Scarfing it down quickly before vacuuming the living room and cleaning the kitchen up. He threw a load of laundry in and flipped through the channels on the TV while the clothes washed.

There wasn’t really anything on so Dean turned it off. There it was. In the blackness of the screen, looking back at him, was his own reflection.

He ran a gentle hand down his scarred face. _Freak_. Dean looked away from the TV; ashamed of himself, and when he looked back, he wasn’t alone.

His father was there. His cold, dark eyes were glaring at the fields of Dean’s own; boring into his soul.

_“You. You did this. It’s your fault, Dean. Its always been your fault. Your mother is DEAD because of you. If you weren’t crying; weren’t screaming, she wouldn’t have crashed! She would still be alive!”_

His father’s hands wrapped around his throat. They grew tighter, and _tighter_ , and ** _tighter._** Dean watched his eyes bulge in his reflection; he watched his father wrap his hands around his throat with rage and hate in his eyes.

He felt all the air leave his lungs. He felt the struggle of his esophagus as he tried to swallow.

His father’s hateful eyes stripped him to the bare bones. But the last person he saw before everything went black, was Sam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! sorry i havent updated in so long, things have been hectic with finals and holidays and all that. But, I have a little time before i have to go back to school so i'll hopefully add at least one more chapter before then. Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Soo..  
> This is my first ever fanfic!  
> Let me know what you guys think! Constructive criticism is appreciated! (Haters will be blocked)  
> This is a multi-chaptered story and I'll be updating as often as I can.  
> Thanks for reading!  
> (This work has been revised and fixed)


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